How To Find A Marriage Counselor And Work Through Relationship Problems
If you and your spouse have been having issues lately, you may find yourself wondering if it's time for some marriage counseling. Needing marital help is nothing to be ashamed of. Many couples suffer silently for years behind closed doors for fear of facing what "people will think."
Everyone has marital issues from time to time. Having disagreements is a normal part of any relationship. The most important thing is to find the resolution that works best for your marriage.
You may be surprised to hear that every disagreement that you and your spouse have provides an opportunity for each one of you to grow. That is if you're willing to do the work. Sometimes, you need professional help to do the work. Going through marriage counseling isn't an easy fix or a one-stop solution for marital discord. For marriage counseling to be effective, you have to be committed to your marriage and stick with the process from start to finish.
This article provides information on many of the marriage counseling options available to you and your partner.
Marriage counseling, free or otherwise
When you search online for marriage counseling options, what you're likely to find is a listing of local resources in your area like churches, schools, professional organizations, and neighborhood organizations. You may also get a listing for local and national hotlines that provide marriage counseling resources over the phone. Some even offer online couples counseling. You'll have to do some legwork to find out which of these resources may be free.
You may be able to find a free marriage counselor by using therapist listing sites like mytherapist.com. Free counseling services may be able to help struggling couples learn better-coping skills.
Online counseling sites like 7 Cups provide unbiased advice and information on therapy resources for more serious or ongoing issues. If your marriage has been having more serious issues than usual or you feel like your marriage may be in danger of a painful breakup or divorce, therapeutic counseling with a licensed therapist may be a better option for you to take than using free therapy options.
That internet search you did will also have called up many options for paid counseling services. Your insurance company will also have listings for therapists. You will want to make sure to do your research to find a provider that will work best for your situation.
Common issues that couples discuss in marriage counseling
Financial issues
Couples who have trouble seeing eye-to-eye on financial issues may find themselves seeking counseling. Financial issues are a common problem for many married couples. This can be especially true when one spouse has a gambling or related issue causing the family financial harm, such as unpaid bills, evictions, or foreclosures.
Emotional issues
One spouse or the other may have emotional issues related to mental health or require emotional support for another reason that hasn't been expressed. A marriage counselor can help couples identify issues they may not have seen or their own.
Extended family
We've all heard the dreaded mother-in-law stories. Some couple's issues with in-laws and extended family may have gotten out of hand and are now threatening the marriage. When extended family issues start to affect the marriage, couples may benefit from professional third-party advice.
Raising children
Conflicts of interest in raising children and blended families are often hot topics of discussion in marriage counseling sessions; when couples go to counseling, they learn to work together, rather than against each other, when it comes to raising kids.
Career
Issues like new job offers or career changes don't always go over well when they affect the entire family. Many couples experience turmoil when unexpected career changes like job transfers, lay-offs, or starting a new job start to take their toll on a marriage.
It's important to note that all of the issues above are a normal part of life that affect many American families. If you felt like you and your family were the only ones having these kinds of challenges, you can breathe a sigh of relief. You're not alone. There is help in the form of family counseling and marriage counseling. The only thing you have to do is commit to finishing the process—and then get started.
How to get started with marriage counseling online
Online therapy has helped many couples work through their problems. Sometimes, it's difficult to get to a physical office for a session—and when you're dealing with more than one schedule, timing can be tricky. Online therapy eliminates both of these issues.
Getting started with marriage counseling online is easy. The first thing you need to do is find a leading therapy provider like or Regain—which specializes in providing marriage, family, and relationship therapy. The therapists on both of these platforms are licensed providers licensed to practice within their state of residence. What this means is that when it's time to choose a provider, you'll be given a pool of therapists to choose from that are licensed to practice in your state.
Once you've selected your provider, you and your spouse will decide on a therapy plan. For example, Regain and BetterHelp offer therapy subscription packages that can start as low as $65- $90 per week.
Married couples and their providers can connect for one-on-one sessions, meet together, or a combination of both. You and the couples therapist can decide on the best way for your therapy sessions to be conducted.
Takeaway
Frequently asked questions (FAQs)
Is marriage counseling covered by health insurance?
Under most health insurance plans, marriage counseling is not covered, but the definitive answer depends on who your insurance provider is. Check with your insurance provider to see what they will cover.
What's the success rate of marriage counseling?
Marriage counseling can actually quite successful, with a of a positive impact. A successful marriage and family therapist can help resolve issues in a relationship and help people move forward together.
When should you seek marriage counseling?
Overall, timing is everything when it comes to seeing a marriage counselor. Visiting a licensed marriage and family therapist earlier, rather than later, can help solve issues more successfully. When your partner isn’t talking, is only talking negatively, is withholding affection, keeping secrets, or contemplating affairs, marriage counseling may help. Find a marriage counselor and attend couples counseling if you and your partner agree that external help is needed.
Do marriage counselors recommend divorce?
A marriage counselor is not there to cast judgment on a relationship or make a verdict. In general, the best marriage counselors will keep their opinions on a relationship to themselves and not recommend divorce. That said, if a couple is dead set on getting a divorce, a licensed marriage and family therapist may switch their services to be focused more on helping both parties prepare for the difficult times ahead. Find a marriage counselor dedicated to listening to you and your partner's situation and one who has experience with your particular issues.
What is the difference between marriage counseling and couples therapy?
The short difference is that marriage counseling tends to deal directly with the present day and focuses on current challenges and how to move past them. Marriage counselors specialize less in the history of conflict. On the other hand, couples counseling, or therapy, focuses on the current challenges and any history that may have led a couple to where they are now.
How much is marriage counseling with insurance?
For the most part, marriage therapy services will not be covered by insurance. Insurance providers do not qualify “relationship issues” as a mental health diagnosis and, as such, are unlikely to provide coverage. Without coverage, marriage and family therapy may have to come out of your pocket. Some marriage counselors are willing to work with your budget and will adjust their price to get you the help you desire, but not all marriage counselors are willing to be this helpful. If you manage to receive coverage for couples counseling, the cost could be cut in half or more. Online therapy may cost less than in-person therapy.
Does marriage counseling really work?
Marriage counseling can have a positive impact on a relationship. Marriage counselors can help walk a couple through any challenging circumstances they are experiencing and help resolve any tensions. Couples and families may all benefit from receiving external counseling assistance. Find a marriage counselor in your area if you believe you and your partner may benefit from external help.
How do you know when marriage counseling isn't working?
Even the best marriage counseling isn’t for everyone. Couples and families may need to decide to quit counseling if they aren’t receiving the help they need from a specific marriage counselor. There are a few signs that can let a couple know marriage counseling isn’t working out for them. First and foremost, if the marriage counselor isn't a good match, it’s best to try another person or location. If this doesn’t work, try to spot other warning signs, such as one partner being forced to attend counseling or a lack of goals for overcoming marital issues. Couples counseling is a long process, but if you and your partner aren’t seeing results, it may be time to quit counseling and seek other options to resolve any conflicts.
Can a marriage be saved?
Even when there are serious tensions and challenges in a relationship, many experts believe that a marriage can be saved with marriage counseling. A marriage counselor can help a couple identify tension points in their relationship and set up a plan for overcoming differences. Every couple has difficult challenges, but couples counseling can help. Find a marriage counselor in your area if you and your partner believe couples counseling may save your relationship.
- Next Article